Thursday, June 30, 2011

Speak The GOOD Words

Yesterday, one girl shared how proud she is of her brother.

"Ci, aku bangga banget loh sama koko'ku sekarang - dia udah banyak berubah - ga seperti dulu. Cici tau banget kan dulu sifatnya gmana......"

And dia jelasin lebih detail ttg betapa hebat koko-nya.

One question I asked her, "Have you told him about this?"

"......hmmm...aku ada pernah cerita ke mama sih!"

Me = "ke koko-mu?"

"..... hmmm belum ci..."

--------------------

Beberapa minggu belakangan ini, ayat ini berulang kali berbicara padaku ....
"Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry." James 1:19


Yes...how easy it is to speak when things go wrong - when we don't like stuffs - when we are mad ....

Tapi, somehow ---- it is that hard to speak when you appreciate someone, to say "I think you are great....", "what you did means a lot to me"..."I care about you"

One woman I admire bercerita that she always reminds her kids, "Nak, semarah apapun kamu -- jaga selalu omonganmu -- jangan pernah bicara pada saat kamu sedang marah -- karena akan ada bekasnya."
That's what I kept telling myself ketika aku lagi kesel - or rasanya mau marah, "When I am hurt - never say hurtful words - coz it will hurt me even more to hurt someone I truly care."
And, it is really true, I don't know about you, but for me -- aku selalu berjuang not to say the "I will regret later" words..

Ironically...why why.... it's just sooo hard to speak good words?! ......
Entah itu gengsi, entah itu budaya (oh, please, stop blaming budaya timur), entah malu......
But, do we know how good words will actually bring impact into someone's life?
--- sama seperti perkataan buruk bisa membawa bekas, I believe perkataan baik pun juga ---

I've been really tired these days. I didn't plan to do anything today -- apalagi tulis notes.. I was laying on my bed, trying to sleep but I just couldn't... 'til I got message from my sister:
"Ci, aku perhatiin cici akir2 ini lagi lemes -- cici lagi ada masalah yah? -- aku kuatir banget loh sama cici! *hugz*"

And she is the reason why I am writing now! Yups, aku tetep aja cape -- karena I do need to rest. But I realized one thing, how great it is to know, to be TOLD and REMINDED that there is someone cares about me. Aku selalu tau betapa dedeku sayang sama aku, tapi the sweet words at the right time, aaaahhh.....sungguh menyegarkan jiwaku

SO, SPEAK THE GOOD WORDS!

"Tapi gue ga biasa ngomong begitu2 lyn!!!!"
I know, butuh practice, sama seperti that girl I mentioned above..mungkin akan sangat susaaaaah tuk bilang ke koko-nya pada awalnya ...but practice makes perfect :)
Percaya ga? Dulu, aku ga pernah bisa bilang "thank you" "maaf" "I love you" ke mama... (serius lyn?) Iyah! Maluuuuu banget, en berasaaaaa aneh luar biasa! And I did a lot of practices! Pertama kali-nya aku ngomong tuh yg deg2an setengah mati ... itupun di telepon, dan langsung matiin telepon saat selesai ngomong. (Can you imagine the scene?)

Practice and practice it! It's a good exercise!

Bukan berarti, karena kita terbiasa, then jadi hambar or istilahnya basa basi loh!
Always mean what you say! If you don't, don't say it, people don't need that! But if you do, say it, people need that!
Rasul Paulus bilang..hendaklah kata2mu senantiasa penuh KASIH - JANGAN HAMBAR...


Dear friends, since I didn't plan to write anything today, and I do really need to rest -- I will stop here..! I think you got what I am trying to say :)
Practice to appreciate what people do to you - and TELL them that you appreciate it.
If you do love someone and care about her, tell her! (yeah yeah -- she knows already, I KNOW..) TELL HER!
"You can do it" - "I believe in you" will cost you nothing. But those words definitely could lift someone up. And you won't know how deep the impact could be!
"Thank you", please! Sincerely!

The list could go on...but I think you know already what to say...rite?
Now, do it!!!!
Speak the GOOD words :)

"Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them." Ephesians 4:29

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Just a'lil bit of Kyoto

It's Sunday evening, weekend is almost over..haha! So, let's talk about something relaxing.
Aku sering banget dapat pertanyaan "kalo ke Jepang enaknya kemana?"
Of course, for me personally, I love Beppu the most -- haha..tapi kalo aku suggest ke orang, KYOTO is a "you better visit" city in Japan! Since it's so Japan!
(Btw, I love Kyoto - after Beppu - Osaka - Kobe, tho! haha!)
But, today is about Kyoto! and there are 3 things, I always WOOOWWW about Kyoto and would love to experience them again!

1. Kyoto station area

I love the building of Kyoto Station (much cooler than Tokyo Station)....
I don't remember how many times I've been here.. hmm more than 6 times sepertinya, and tiap kali selalu masi Wooowww aja ama the building. *so, tidak benar kalo dibilang aku tukang bosen! hahaha.. I am very loyal! Try me! :D



and ini foto dalam-nya:


Nah, pas di seberang Kyoto Eki (station in Japanese) -- itu ada Kyoto Tower. Hmm, aku pernah naek sekali, menurutku biasa2 aja sih, ga secantik Tokyo Tower. Kalau mau liat Kyoto secara keseluruhan, lebih baik ke Kiyomizu Tera (Temple) aja.. tar ada foto-nya di bawah :)
Ini Kyoto Tower, yang putih merah itu:


Terus yang sangat unik dan I love so much about Kyoto adalah ... KOTAK POS-nya warna COKLAT! hihi, kalo di Doraemon kan warna merah, begitu juga di kota2 laen di jepang. (pasti bingung kan kenapa aku bisa suka sama beginian doank?)
Pertama, karena aku emang orangnya gampang hepi .. haha! For me, unik aja :D I always love something yang spesial, yang ada reason - I appreciate small things :$
And kedua, karena alasannya adalah buat tetep jaga Kyoto sebagai kota yg Jepang banget! Bahkan McD-nya juga bukan warna merah tulisannya, tapi coklat!


Central Post Office ada di dekat Kyoto Station juga:


2. Kiyomizu Temple

Sebenernya kan tuh, Kyoto emang banyak bener kuil2 kan.
Termasuk yg cukup keren itu adalah Kinkakuji (Golden Temple):



Tapi for me, aku selalu suka Kiyomizu Tera, jadi kalo disuruh pilih 1 temple aja untuk aku pergi, I would choose Kiyomizu Tera :D
Selain karena sepanjang jalan menuju temple itu penuh ama toko2 (padahal ga belanja juga..hepi ajaaaaaaaa....inget, aku gampang hepi, haha!)


Dan terutama, aku selalu suka 1 spot ini tuk foto (the one I told you earlier, bisa memandang Kyoto jauuuuuh ke depan, keliatan kan ada Kyoto Tower-nya disana?):


Here's my 2nd fave spot (memandang toko jauuuuh ke depan):



3. I smell MACHA everywhere <3 <3 <3

I love Macha - Japanese Green Tea like soooo much! Es krim favorite ku has been always Green Tea :) and in Kyoto, it's everywhere. So' it's like you breathe it (lebay!)




So, if you ever want to visit Japan dan mau ajak aku (haha!!) Aku tidak akan pernah bosan ke Kyoto lagi for these reasons ;)

Saturday, June 25, 2011

First Homework = To Adapt

Alright girls, buat kamu yg udah baca all the three types of men in Preparing to be a Help Meet, maybe maybe.. some of you started to berandai2 -- ataupun buka mata lebih lebar terhadap pria2 di sekelilingmu, mulai lihat mana yang Prophet, Priest or King – krn somehow berasa lebih jelas tipe cowo mana yg “saya MAU dan saya pikir cocok dgn saya.”

I truly understand what you feel :)
Sejak dulu, I always dreamed for a Kingly type! I had no idea about the types of men, tho - I hadn't read the book! All I knew, I "needed" cowo terdepan di medan perang. For me, this kind of man is capable to "lead" me since I am myself, a leader. And he is charming, what!? A guy who talks one word and can change a world? Doaku adalah "Tuhan berikan aku cowo model itu -- supaya AKU -- supaya AKU..."

And, to be honest with you, kalo seandainya aku baca ttg Steady Man sebelum pacaran -- MUNGKIN aku tidak akan pernah berpikir kalo this Priest could really steal my heart! Ga tanggung, saudari2, God bless me with 100% steady man! After years hatiku tertutup rapat setelah patah hati dan proses renewal terindah (horee!!), I would never imagined, yg mampu membuat hati ku terbuka LAGI bukanlah seorang pria yg sedang berdiri di depan dgn segala kharisma-nya memimpin (spt yg selama ini aku pikir aku "butuhkan") - tapi justru adalah this man who puts others first and has a beautiful gentle servant heart!
Itu belum jadian beibeh, belum! Itu adalah awal2 aku realized "Oh, there is a guy!"
dan proses pertemanan kami (we were purely just friends ... ) sampai sekarang masi berpacaran ... I realized how God knows better than I do!
Oke - how I finally realized that is another story to tell.. :$ (maybe some other time..haha)

Let's back to our fantasies.. ! I am not saying that tidak boleh "pilih2" mau prophet / priest / king.. (siapa juga aku? haha). Bole banget!! That's what I did rite? I wanted a king.
But, let me remind you something - always remember that God created us to be a help meet! Not the other way around, our man is not our help meet.
It is, of course, sangatlah manusiawi - menginginkan sesuatu yg kita pikir cocok dan baik untuk kita (kalo bukan kita yg mikirin diri sendiri siapa lagi?!? hehe, GOD -- HE knows and cares about you more than you do!). But, I invite you to take a higher level, instead of memikirkan cowo mana yg baik untuk saya (krn it doesn't take us anywhere) - let's prepare ourselves by developing our gifts, talents and beautifying our inner and outer to be ready for someone God wants you to be his help meet.

Let's do it!!

A good help meet is called to adapt!
(Loooh bukannya relationship harus SALING adaptasi? Well - betul sekali) Tapi..level lebih tinggi tuk beradaptasi dimiliki oleh kita para wanita (horeeeeeeee!) yang dicintai oleh pria (lebih horeeeee lagi!) Again, I am sharing this to you, karena I know, you are willing to obey His will, to do our part that is to submit. (Ephesians 5:22-33)

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Sometimes, ketika kita berpikir tipe cowo mana yg cocok buat kita, salah satu alasannya adalah cowo mana yg easy to live with (means, easy to adapt). Betul atau betul? Gapapa banget untuk berpikir seperti itu, tapi harus juga kita ingat, bahwa "ber-adaptasi" itu tidak lah semengerikan yg kita bayangkan. Most of the time, itu akan membuat karakter kita semakin baik.

Aku realized one thing selama aku menjalani this relationship - why men and women have to be different - why he thinks logically I feel emotionally - itu adalah supaya I could learn to LOVE UNSELFISHLY and to PUT OTHER (in this case, my man) FIRST. Dan itu adalah kehendak Tuhan! So, a good relationship when we are willing to adapt to our partners - will bring us to do God's will.



Kalo kita (cewe) aja yg adapt, then kita kehilangan jati diri kita donk? - you might ask that -
Hmm, girls, I am not an expert in this, but I can share my experience :)
Namun sebelumnya, tolong samakan persepsi, when I talk about guys (whether he is a prophet, priest, or king) - we talk about God-fearing men. Pria yg mengasihi Kristus dan punya kerinduan untuk menyerupai Kristus setiap hari.
Alright, bicara tentang jati diri, we (both men and women) - our goals adalah menjadi seperti Kristus dan menjalani kehendakNya! Jadi ketika kedua pasangan ada dalam pertandingan yg sama - we have the same goal.
And, we both know our own position - the head of man is Christ and the head of the woman is the man.
Jadi - goal kita jelas => Christlikeness, posisi juga jelas, rite?
So, ketika kita ber-adaptasi (yg mungkin kita takutkan), kita "hanya" beradaptasi dalam menyesuaikan kepentingan kita dgn pasangan, atau hobby, atau waktu, ataupun mungkin sedikit sifat/karakter (yg trust me, penyesuain karakter dgn pasangan akan akan akan menumbuhkan karakter yg makin cantik).
Jadi, tidak ada pasangan dalam Kristus (yg punya the same goal) yg ber-adaptasi tuk melawan perintah Tuhan.(jadi, jangan parno - jangan parno!)

Elisabeth Elliot dalam The Mark of a Man wrote this,
If you find a woman who is ready to go where you go and do what you do without brooding about being "her own person", you'll have found a treasure.
She will have to be a woman who has submitted herself to God, first of all, because otherwise she'll be listening to the insistent voices around her, telling her that she's got to be independent and autonomous, that she ought not to be "only" somebody's wife or somebody's mother, that she needs to seek fulfillment for herself and that can only be found beyond the bounds of home.
If, having submitted herself to God, she understands that what He had in mind when He made her was response - in order that both man and woman be fulfilled - she will be at peace with the arrangement.

Salah satu hal yg I learnt to adapt to my man adalah masalah waktu. As you might have read, a Priest man needs to be left alone to do his daily routine. Unlike a Prophet who is really consumed with his girl, or a King who always wants to know where his woman is - what she does, a Priest is content with his life. In my case, terlebih - we both are busy - and we are in long distance relationship. :$ and you know, girls - how hard it is. Perasaan spt he doesn't need me as I do -pun ada, since again he is a Priest, he is a man in demand. I don't own him all by myself.

Awal2, I expected much! hmm.. I understood that I needed to adapt - but, I thought didn't he need to adapt to my needs (more time and more me) too?
It's God's grace - really, 'til I finally realized it's me to adapt! 'coz I realized too what I thought "I needed" was simply "I wanted" -- and again, my goal is to love him unselfishly. It wasn't easy - I cried and I wasn't happy. But it's God's will, and so far it's been a very wonderful and beautiful journey, all by His grace <3 For He promised that we can do all things with Him who strengthen us. Termasuk to adapt to our partner one day! He provided me strength to adapt, and I know He will always do! It's only one thing, and I am still learning and still a lot work to do.

God wants to make us become a lovely help meet. To be a good one takes effort... lots of effort.

So, girls, ask yourself = are you willing to adapt?
(Again, I was talking about a responsible, reliable, loving, dependable God fearing man, oke?!)
Kalo Tuhan "mengirimkan" a King di pintu rumah-mu, are you ready to adapt to his 'controlling' yet really loving nature, to be humble and listen to him?
Or, if it's a Prophet, are you ready to support him, not to look down on him, to always stand by his side?
If it's a Priest, to have a gentle spirit, to share him with others and to serve people with him?

Debi Pearl wrote this "God is not impressed by our gifts, our types or our strengths. He is impressed by our willingness to abide by and appreciate his program by conforming to the needs of our man."

How will I know? Start now! Start to adapt to your parents, your siblings, your friends... Remember, the preparation is on progress!

PS. it isn't finished yet..haha.. to be continued "Why I should keep the options wide opened?" 'coz God knows better, next :)

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Honor Your King, oh Adorable Queen!

I've shared to you these last weeks - The Three Types of Men - The First Type = The Prophet - The Second Type - The Priest.

Now, here we are girls..the last type of three ... => the KING, Mr. Command Man.

In this book, it's written that this man is extreme~! I've never quite understood what it was to be extreme 'til I heard the example my girl gave about the Kingly type!
Yes, one of my girls mentioned the most annoying guy we ever known, as Kingly type. He's so controlling, demanding! He shows everyone that his girlfriend (now, his wife) is his, and no one can ever have her (we're no longer be friends with her after they're together...huhu, posesif)
I know, it seems so extreme -- but he's really there, and don't worry, girls, he is definitely the extremely negative King! >.<

For me, personally - when I tried to think guys around me who are Kingly enough, to be honest with ya, I couldn't find any~! haha! But, but!!! I remember all the leaders on this planet earth! Extreme yeah!? Semua pemimpin yg hebat - para hamba Tuhan besar, ooh~~ they're blessed and trusted with the characters of our God the Father - dominant, sovereign, and in command!

And, why did I have a hard time to find guys around me? Because God created just a few! (And I didn't try hard enough..hahaha) Oh yeah, this world needs several leaders only with a lot of people to follow :)

King Triton is one of them :D


Here's why I realized how extreme this man could be!
If, this man uses his nature of leadership - commanding or anything in negative way, oh yeah - you find yourself, an annoying - hard to live with - do whatever it takes to get what he wants - guy!
But, if by God's grace, he knows if there is a reason God gives him the privilege - he will lead his family, his company, his church, or anything he's involved to the top.

And -- we, hey girls, who are HELP MEETs - if we ever married to this guy, remember this - you could be a blessing or a curse to many people by how you related to your Command Man.

(banyak sekali kisah di Alkitab, or di dunia jaman ini, mana istri presiden yg bikin kaco - mana istri presiden bikin suaminya makin melambung ... ) Now, you know what I am trying to tell you, rite!? --> gimana jadi istri presiden yg keren!!

First, for he is a King - he EXPECTS you to wait on him hand and foot. He doesn't want you involved in any project that prevents you from SERVING him.
So, learn now to serve with JOY :)
He usually loves fine meals served on time and in good order. But, don't expect him to help you in the kitchen, okay? It's not under his authority! The kitchen is your kingdom!! Yihiiiiii~
My friend added, "OH, siapin baju buat dia kerja!"
Don't you think it's cute? Or, maybe you think "aduh reseh deh!" tapi trust me, girls, deep inside our hearts .. kita punya hati suka ngatur2 baju orang (hello0000, kenapa ada Barbie?)
So, be happy if you are married with this guy! Because he expects you to do it! Clicks ;)

He is not intimate or vulnerable in sharing his feelings with you. He seems to be sufficient unto himself. You may feel shut out. This is how you need to do to "earn" his heart = prove that you will stand by him, faithful, loyal and obedient. When you have won his confidence, he will treasure you to the EXTREME!

Ok, he is a king! He has vision! So, if you don't support him, sorry ladies to tell you, he will go on without you! But if you do, he will honor you with glory.

The Kingly Man feels it his duty and responsibility to lead people. (oh, how we need a leader, not every people have confidence to lead!). And you know, nature kebanyakan orang - kalo pemimpin salah di-protes, kalo benar belum tentu di-puji! The road is not easy. So, the wife! You need to stand by him. He will grow much faster as a man and a leader if you march forward as a couple united in mind and heart. If you pray for him, support him, encourage him, and act as his faithful right hand man, he will be more capable to serve a greater number in wisdom and humility.

Since he is a King - means he needs a queen! So, you are the Queen to share his fame and glory. And since you are "just" a queen, be content to take the second seat (oh, come on, girls, be humble, you are on the Queen seat!).
If a wife learns early to enjoy the benefits of taking the second seat, and if she does not take offense to his headstrong aggressiveness, she will be the one sitting at his right side being adored, because this kind of man will totally adore his woman and exalt her. She will be his closest and sometimes his only confidante.
You will love it! Wanita mana yg ga mau di-adore and exalt? Yes, baby, you are his queen. So, act as one! Think before you do something .. again, I think it's a call to every girls to do good to our husbands all the days of our lives. (Proverbs 31:12)

He loves to control! It is his nature. He wants to know where you are, what you are doing, and why! He will correct you!
Ok, maybe you might think... "oouch, who does he think he is?" He is your husband! and maybe, it seems he's over protective .. yeah, it's most likely to happen, apalagi kalo your guy not that mature ... BUT, if he is so loving and mature ... once again, I will say --- you will love it! Let's be honest with ourselves, we love when our men are crazy about us, rite? So, if you ever marry to this guy.... it is his nature, be content - and let me give you extra tips ... always let him know where you are - what you are doing and why, and make sure you get his approval :)

He likes to talk about plans, ideas and unfinished projects. He will be very objective, very unemotional, and not enjoy small talk. His vision is like a man looking from a high mountain, focused on the distant goal. The wife needs to help him remember individual's needs. Bring him back to the earth..

Money! You will feel secure in your husband's ability to take care of you, due to his commanding confidence. So, be rest - let him do the command on how you should spend the money. You won't win.

Whether you are married to a King or any kind, you know that it's God's will to submit and obey your husbands.
Here's one thing you must really understand. When a Kingly Man (lost or saved) is treated with honor and reverence, a good help meet will find that her man will be wonderfully protective and supportive (oh, admit, you want it -- but, please do your part first! Honor him!!!).
In most marriages, the strife is not because the man is cruel or evil, it is because he expects obedience, honor and reverence, and is not getting it. Thus, he reacts badly. :(
So, my respectable girls, which kind of help meet you want to be?
Be honest, and do the work! :D

PS. maybe after you read all the three, you started to create your own fantasy (me wants a prophet - or I want to be a queen - or please, God, gimme steady man). Alrite, I will share what I think (from what I learnt) about this on my next writing :)
Ooooh, and you will like it as well - the next chapter of Preparing to be a Help Meet is Three Types of Women. So, please wait next week yaaaaaa!!!
God bless!

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

If You Fall in Love with The Priest

Alrighty, girls :D :D
Here's one of my favorite chapters of Preparing to be a Help Meet. Chapter 4: The Priest.
The chapter has so much red ink on it .. haha~! and I think, most of you girls will love this too -- or lebih tepatnya, most girls will fall in love with this kind of guy, the Steady Man :)
In fact, God created more men in this "image", the most steady and easygoing of the three types, not given to extremes. (so, tenang, stok-nya banyak..haha!)


The more I read about this man, the more I fall in love, the more I know that it is a lot to take to be his wife. Though among the three, this man will rarely push, pressure, force, or hurry you (yeeaah!) - He won't tell you what to do and serve him, like a Kingly man - nor will he want you to do what he is doing, like a Visionary man. He will simply want you to walk beside him, yet grow in your own right before God and man! (told you! haha, fall in love already with this guy?)

You are not gonna be alone, wifey - 'coz your husband will be liked by everyone! And seems to just let people use him. He is always ready to help people, he loves to serve. He belongs to people.

Now, you know what I am going to tell you ---
Here's the thing, girls~! God created us to be a help meet, means that we will need to learn to conform to our man.
If you are blessed with this man, one thing you need to do is to as active helping others as your husband is. Be ready to have a full of people in your house (yiiiiihaaaaa.. :D :D so learn now to make a lovely home!)

- and our steady man, he will really take his time to make up his mind! For we, who are impatient, it's not easy :$ so learn, to listen - to stand still, seek to always have a gentle spirit.
Yes, it's really true that he will appreciate your initiative. But, always have in mind, he is the leader. Don't be critical. Nor be controlling! He just wants peace, to be left alone to do his daily routine and enjoy the company of people who are not all fired up or critical.

Here's one thing I want to share (from me, not from the book). I am truly blessed with a 100% steady man :D (that's why I kept telling you, how much I am in love with this guy) ..haha- I am naturally impatient, I've been leaders in almost every organizations I involved, I take decision pretty quick. So, you know, it's not without struggle I need to wait for him. Kalo hal-nya cuma masalah kecil, I would ask ..."what do you think about this?" and I wait.
Kalo masalah besar, and I really know it's not my part to ask, I pray! and pray! Aku selalu bilang gini ke Tuhan .. "Lord, hal ini really bother me, tapi I know it's not my part to take the initiative. It's his part. Kalo memang Engkau bilang, 'sudah saatnya' biar Tuhan yg bicara, and he will tell me."
And believe me, girls! God works! at the perfect time! His time! not my time - nor his time. And u know what, waktu Tuhan ga pernah terlambat -- selalu paaaaaaaaas :D en pada saat-nya, ketika kita SUKSES wait and stand still, you will see the beauty of your relationship, that you know God is in it! You will love him more, 'coz you know it's His will for you to love him :)
(but you know, I am still learning - and I sometimes fail too, that's why I need Him, God who loves him more than I do) One verse that He kept telling me, Psalm 46:10 "be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for Him to act!" again, I would tell you => you will love how God works on His perfect time :D

The Priest kind a guy would love you to use your natural skills, abilities and drives. Your achievements will be an honor to him, but if you are lazy or slothful will greatly discourage him. A Priestly Man really values a resourceful, hardworking woman who shows dignity and honor. And be sufficient in all the tasks of daily living.
So, girls, start today learning to be creative and useful :D Don't eat the bread of idleness (oh, one of my faves P31) If you are busy and productive now, than you will be too after you got married.
'coz at the end of the day, he will weigh his accomplishment with yours - and will rejoice in the value of having a worthy partner in the grace of life.

His vision is as a man seeing life just as it is. Not focus on eternal picture - nor looking too details.

This Priest will most want to please his wife. So, be thankful :)

Oh, one more important thing too!!!!! He will not waste money nor take reckless chances. So, be wise on spending money, girls... (ooops)

Here's tambahan from a friend of mine who is married to a Priest:

Some women equate their husband’s wise caution and lack of open passion as being unspiritual. His lack of spontaneity and open boldness may look like indifference to spiritual things. However, he is like deep, deep water. The very depth makes the movement almost imperceptible, but it is, nevertheless, very strong.

Your husband will not talk much about spirituality - not like a Visionary man. Bukan karena dia tidak bicara hal rohani, juga tidak mengomentari hal2 rohani, tidak memimpin di depan (leading praise and worship, sharing etc) means he is not a Godly man. He is a man of action! Dia melakukan pelayanan yg tidak diliat orang. And dia melakukannya dengan setia.
So, kita harus me'luruskan pandangan kita terhadap Godly man itu. Accept him for who he is, for the man after God's heart who loves him on his own way, who is loyal to his family and his God.

So, dear girls, whether you are married to a Priest - or you are still preparing, let's use our time now to use our gifts to serve others, to be productive, and to learn to have a gentle spirit :)


GONGCHA is My New Kochakaden

Alrite, I got a lot of stuffs in my head to do and to write!
One, of course, aku masi utang update Chapter 4 "Preparing to be a Help Meet" :$

Tapi this thing, really bothered me sepanjang hari! Yaitu ==> travelling. (or mgkn sweet escaping? Karena ke Bogor once in a while is more like a sweet escaping, than travelling)
I've been thinking where I have been and have done~ and I do feel like just sharing about it.
No no ... I don't love details :$ so, I am not gonna share about where I stayed, how much money I spent, tralala tralala... ~ Nope, just simple stuffs I feel so much blessed or fell in love during my trips. And would love to do again, if I ever got chances~
(hopefully, I will keep updating with new stuffs ya :$)

And, GONGCHA will be the firstborn.. haha! :D

I love milk - I love tea and I love milk tea so much! During my college years in Japan -- I was crazily in love with Kochakaden (Royal Milk Tea) by Cocacola..

It's my first drink I bought after I landed in Narita Airport on my last visit to Japan (been 3 years)

I think 50% of total weight I gained in Japan was because of it :$

Back for good ke Indo - it's one of things I miss so much about Japan.
Cobain Quickly - any teh tarik lah - chai tea lah (I know, emang beda kan semua tuh..haha) -- ga ada yg bisa mengobati rinduku... (and yes, I lost all the weight I gained!!haha :D)

'til one day, ke Singapore, my sweet boyfriend ajak minum GONGCHA!!!!!!!!!

@ Vivo City, May 2011

I tried House Special Gong Cha Milk Oolong Tea.. I've tried Alisan Tea too, but I love Oolong more :D
I love the milk - I love the tea! I just love it so much~~!!
- the softness - the taste --- It's my new Kochakaden!
with no pearl! 'coz I really need to tell you - that, I love milk tea, just MILK TEA!



it's around 2-3 SGD


And it's really one of my top ten "What I Want to Have in Singapore" lists.

Ooh, you might wonder what the lists are ya? Here they are:
1. Arief Adhitya
2. Arief Adhitya
3. Arief Adhitya
4. Arief Adhitya
5. Arief Adhitya
6. Arief Adhitya
7. Arief Adhitya
8. Arief Adhitya
9. Arief Adhitya
10. Gongcha
Fyi, Arief Adhitya is my boyfriend.. so, I don't share :)

for Gongcha, of course... I would love to share it with you if we ever go together. :D

me and my sweet sista

Have a sweet day :)


Thursday, June 9, 2011

FEAR FACTOR

Selama 2 bulan pake kawat gigi, aku ga pernah setakut ini kontrol ke dokter gigi.
Karena hari itu -- aku harus cabut gigi >.<
Luckily, aku datang dgn sepupu'ku -- yg juga mau pasang kawat. *jadi ada teman sengsara*
Dia dcabut 3. Aku cuma 2. Hore :D *cabutnya 1-1 kok*

Walau cuma 2 - namanya cabut mah, sakit sakit aja. Aku takkkkuuuttt luar biasa, to be honest with you~ tapi aku sok tegar, kenapa? JAIM donk, karena aku bawa dede sepupu yg jauh lebiiiiiiiiiiih takut dari aku!
Dan takutnya real bgt, ga kayak aku. Masi sok tegar and cool!
Bibirnya bergetar. Begitu juga tangan dan kaki-nya~ Pertama, I thought it was kinda cute.
Tapi lama2 .. "Ciiii, aku takut banget. Aku takut banget!" *dah mana, papa mama nya ga ikut. Jadi si cici lah yg harus menenangkan si dede* Ga tega banget.. :$
Dalam hati yg, "Duiillah, cici juga takut banget nih!"
Tapi naluri ke-cici-an langsung keluar ... dan bilang "De, tenang saja. Cabut gigi tidak sesakit yang kamu bayangkan. Jarum itu pun tidak semengerikan yang kamu bayangkan. Yang membuat kamu takut sekali hanyalah pemikiran kamu. Tenang saja, dokter ini dah biasa kok. Percaya :)"

Akirnya setelah bbrp menit, dia berhasil tenang... en CABUTZ!!
Dan tibalah, giliran cici!
Oh yeah, baby, aku harus makan omonganku sendiri!
I speak to myself -- "Ini tidak semengerikan yang aku bayangkan!"

At that moment, I realized one thing dalam hidupku...
Seringkaliiii ............ aku membayangkan sesuatu lebiiiiiiih dari kenyataannya.
Yang membuatku TAKUT - KUATIR berlebihan.

Aku ga pernah ngerti, kenapa dede2ku suka banget nonton SpongeBob! Sampai one day -- aku nonton cuma 3 menit menemani mereka. Dan ternyata, karena lucu~ :D
Ceritanya gini.. Spongebob and Patrick lagi mau pegi ke theme park. (yoi, di bawah laut). One ride yg mereka takutin banget adalah roller coaster. (oooh, I truly understand them :$)
Sampe2 - sblm mereka actually pegi ke theme park itu, SpongeBob mimpi ... mimpinya adalah -----
mulai dari kereta itu berjalan -------- naik ke puncak tertinggi ---- turun dengan kecepatan super cepat ------ and deng, rel-nya rusak ---- tiba2 Spongebob dan Patrick terlempar --- kemana? --- ke liang kubur yg 2-2nya udah ada namanya, nama mereka b2 --
Aku ketawa super ngakak ..... pas itu!! I was like "I could relate..I could relate"

Esok harinya, bener2 nih mereka naek ride-nya! *hebat juga, dah mimpi buruk gt, masi tetep naek! haha*
And, u could guess the ending..
Turun ride-nya... They danced "We didn't die.. we didn't die!"

Ooh, how I could relate, really! I have experienced it myself.
Disneysea - Tower of Terror ... (itu loooh, yg kita di angkat ke atas setinggi-nya terus dibuang ke bawah >.<)
Dari awal, setelah my cousin and my boyfriend looked very excited mau naik *it was the only ride they really looked forward buat naek, malah*... aku dah super stresss... and literally -- jantung berdebar2 ga berhenti.
Makin parah -- pas ngantri -- the whole 2 hours, aku pucat pasi -- dan takuuuuuuuuuttttt luar biasa! :$
Aku berharap -- "coba aku ga sok jago".. kayak uncle-ku yg tunggu di luar ... dengan alasan "ah, ngapain ngantri 2 jam..? gue nonton parade aja!" padahal takuut tuh :p

Sepanjang ride -- aku tutup mata! Dtambah mengerikan -- some japanese girls di belakang teriak kenceng bgt "Yameetteeeeeee --- yabaiii yabaaaiiiii" artinya "stop it stop it .. parah parah.. gawat!"

See? I was the only rider with closed eyes :$

And, setelah turun .. apa yg aku rasakan...?!
"Ooh, gitu doank toh? Kapan2 bole lagi!!!" *Yeeee? Emang Chiba deket, lyn?*

THE TERROR BEHIND ME >.<


Alrite, I might berhasil mengalahkan ketakutanku dgn tetep sok jago naek Tower of Terror!

Tapi -- kebahagiaan-ku berkurang! Aku takut sepanjang ride!
and.. I missed the most beautiful part! Saat we're on the top of the tower -- itu adalah saat u should have your eyes wide opened. To see the beauty of Disney Sea! And, me? Because of my super tiny heart, I closed my eyes -- and wished "segeralah berakhir"

Dari dokter gigi - Spongebob dan Tower of Terror..
aku realized that --
seringkali kekuatiranku dan ketakutanku mengurangi SUKACITA (the thrill from Tower of Terror) dgn sempurna. dan BLESSINGS (the beauty of Disneysea) yg sudah Tuhan sediakan di depan sana.
Jim Elliot tulis ini dalam suratnya ke Elisabeth Elliot,
Ingatlah bawah bayangan suatu benda sering melampau ukuran benda itu sendiri (apalagi jika cahayanya begitu rendah pada horizon) dan meskipun sebagian ketakutan terhadap masa depan mungkin akan memamerkan kegelapannya yg mengerikan saat kau mendekatinya, tapi semuanya itu hanya sebuah bintik (a speck) saat dilihat dr seberang. Oh, kiranya Ia sering memulihkan kita dengan "aspek (aspect) dr sebrang" untuk melihat sesuatu sebagaimana Ia melihatnya, untuk mengingat bahwa Ia berelasi dengan kita bagaikan dengan anak2Nya.

Oke -- Tower of Terror might be just a little thing --
tapi seberapa sering, kekuatiran kita akan hari depan membuat kita ga mampu melangkah, bahkan mundur?
Or seandainya, dengan berani kita tetap melangkah pun, tidak ada sukacita along the way? Karena kita masi memegang teguh kuatir dan takut kita - dan belum menyerah~
"Serahkanlah kekuatiranmu kepadaNya, sebab Ia memelihara kamu." begitu kata Rasul Petrus.

Entah itu a new job, moving out, a new relationship, a new step of relationship, graduate school -- or any decision yg saat ini sedang kita gumulkan (baca= takutkan). If God clearly says "GO!"
Don't let your fear and worries hold you back!
There are joy and blessings God has provided, you just need to take a step.

Dan terlebih, Dia jelas tahu apa yg akan kita lalui.
*bukan berarti kita selonong boy - ga berhikmat ya! Kalo dah jelas2, begitu ada orang teriak, kita kaget, pingsan. Itu berarti jantung ga kuat! Jangan sok2 jago naek roller coaster! *
Tapi, kalo ketakutan itu hanya krn pemikiran kita yg terlalu kreatif.. mari serahkan kepada sang Ahli tuk mengubahnya menjadi damai sejati!
Again, Filipi 4:6-7 :) Let Him work in you!

Oh btw, buat Anda sang Pemberani - jangan juga anggap ketakutan seseorang itu hal yg kecil loh :$ krn most of the time, we are really freaking scared! >.< Don't laugh at us! Understand and encourage us..
It takes a courage sometimes to tell how scared we are! We need someone to have sympathy.
Once, ketika aku shared ke anak2 remaja, bgmana aku takut bgt naek roller coaster. One teenage boy said this "I prayed before I took the ride ci. Awalnya aku takut banget, setelah itu, gak lagi :)". What an encouragement!!

Let's have a super joy and super peace along the ride with the Lord!
He's the one who has the complete picture, and after all - He is in control! Trust Him! *as I trusted the dentist and Disney sea :$*
We are just to enjoy the ride! :D :D

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

mom ain't the enemy, the bajajs are!

i will say it out loud, FINALLY --OOH REALLY FINALLY!!! I DRIVE!!! a real car!
driving => has been my new year resolution since 2007, haha! sejak for good ke indo! and skrg taon berapa lyn? betul, 2011! but, i don't care! a resolution accomplished! yihiiiiii ~!

am i truly happy? oh, u bet, i am!
BUT, there is one thing always happens when i drive and my mom is there.
"REEEEEEEEEEEMMMM!!!"
"BAJAAAAAAAAAJ!!"
"lu ga liat kan tuh ada gerobak?" *trust me, really, saya liat.. T_T*

my younger sis who's always been there, sejak aku mati mesin 10 menit sekali sampai aku meluncur di jalan tol pas ujan lebat, bilang "ma, tenang aja napa? cici udah bisa! kalo mami grogi, kan malah ganggu!"
thanks, my cheerleader :D

awal2 sih bete bener kalo jalan sama mami. ga jarang, turun mobil aku yg masi cemberut!
what i had in mind adalah .. "u don't trust me, mom!"

sampai akirnya, last nite, when i had a wonderful "Preparing to be a Help Meet" class with my girls -- entah gmana, pembicaraan beralih ke NYOKAP!

"i don't know why, but it seems that my mom ga pernah puas dgn apa yg gue capai."
"i've been living pleasing my mom sampai skrg, kapan donk gue bisa hidup 'tuk diri gue sendiri."
i was all ears sepanjang curhat...
sampai, akirnya.... it's time for me to speak :$

eyn, "ga usah masalah BIG dalam hidup kita - nyetir aja, most of the time, i have an argument with my mom!" *btw, my older sis has too :D tho, she's been driving forever! haha*
the thing is -- ibaratnya sebuah perjalanan. walau jurang masih berjarak 30 m di depan kita. dari 100 m, mama kita akan berteriak "STOP!" sampai we finally stop!
it happens to me all the time, rite? bajaj masi jauh - tapi mama sudah "BAJAJ!"
kenapa?
bukan karena mama pikir aku buta - tapi mama will do whatever to make sure that her beloved daughter liat itu bajaj *baca = selamat!*

ada one thing yang aku suka banget di buku Preparing --
Debi Pearl bilang gini:
Keep in mind that your mother is not the enemy. She is Mom. She is the one who cared for you when you were sick; she is the one who believed in you when you were down. She is the one who would have given her very life for you if you were in need, but, because she is Mom, she will be the first to speak out when she thinks you might be hurting.

oh, how true!
my mom is not the enemy, the bajajs are!
karena mama lah - aku bisa balik badan - duduk - merangkak - berjalan - berlari dan menyetir.
karena mama juga lah - aku bisa nulis - baca - sekolah - kuliah dan akirnya bekerja.
it's not that moms don't trust us, really! but, mom is the one who has been there dari awal we're nothing 'til we're a little bit of something!

and, for me, the main reason why mom sometimes acts that way - because she's all worried about us. she would give her life for us.. (huhu. duh pas ngelahirin aja dia udah mempertaruhkan nyawa >.<)

mom is woman sejati. *oke, mari semua wanita berkaca.*
future minded.
worry.
control-freak.
we are just like her... hanya saja, kita belum punya anak perempuan >.<

bedanya adalah, by HIS GRACE!
we know that our future are in His hands.
ketika we are worried about so many things... Philippians 4:6-7 pop up! kita telah berlatih tuk turn our worries into prayers. *itupun, we fail so many time, rite?*

not all of us, diberkati dgn a Godly mom, i would say.
i grew up with friends whose struggles're "gue ga dikasi ke gereja ama nyokap." "gimana cara yakinin nyokap gue supaya gue bole ikut ret2." "friends, please pray for my parents' salvation."
they don't know about all stuffs!
all she knows adalah -- she's been working hard 'til now for you! and she wants what she thinks (not God thinks) the best for you!

begitu jgn dgn my mom. *she goes to church every week with me, but not yet -- not yet, i still pray for her*
yesterday, again saat menyetir - i talked to her *lovingly* not to worry tooooooo much ttg anak2nya *yeaaah, i know ga pantes ngomong gt ke ortu*
tapi i shared the truth to her, aku bilang "ma, hidup kita di tangan Tuhan. hanya Tuhan yg pegang kendali. pada saat mama mulai kuatir, coba deh mama berdoa. karena Tuhan yg berkuasa menjaga."

so, dear beloved daughters of our moms and our heavenly Father.
stop the argument with our moms! replace it with loving discussion and sharing about the Truth.
*how could we listen to our friends with love. willing to be in their shoes. understand them. appreciate their point of views? BUT, not with our moms!??!*
be humble to listen to her, coz most of time - she's right :D

ketika mama mulai "aduh, kenapa lu umur segini belum punya pacar? kebanyakan milih sih!!" or "aduuuh, lu kerja cuma jadi begituan doang mah ga bakal sukses deh!"
dgn kasih, tell her, God is in control! *jangan stop di situ..haha.. ceritakan how He worked :) *

and hey, btw - jgn harap mama bakal dengar kita ttg Kristus kalo kelakuan kita tidak mencerminkan Allah yg kita sembah yo! ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER!
i love this verse:
.... if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their daughters, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 1 peter 3:1-2

sering denger ini? "anak kecil tau apa sih?"
*btw, i am thankful that my mom never say those hurting words, though she's not a truly Christian YET.*
though my mom had to admit - "kenapa sih mama kuatir melulu sama kamu ya, padahal kamu udah 26! mama selalu ngerasa kamu tuh masi keciilll aja" i was like, "EXACTLY, MOM!"
another powerful verse....
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers (and your mom!) in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity. 1 Timothy 4:12
ayat ini bukan supaya kita bisa jadi petantang-petenteng. "jangan anggap gue rendah!" NO!!
tapi to remind us, to always set an example! after all, we are adalah saksiNya di dunia ini... !
ini berlaku tuk siapapun - what people see in us? do they see our SUPER COOL JESUS?

so, yesterday from the Prophet discussion 'til MOM --
i remembered one thing i always say to myself .. that = my current family *on this topic, my mom* is really where i learn what it is to submit, to serve, to love unselfishly, to listen, to be patient, to have a wise discussion 'til one day i do them all to my husband :)
the preparation has started, ladies, don't miss it!!!!!

TREASURE YOUR MOM FOR THE WONDERFUL FRIEND SHE IS.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

what it takes to be a Prophet wife

I have 2 groups (at this moment - who knows it could be a whole large classroom..haha) discussing "Preparing to be a Help Meet" :D
one - my college friends. the other one - my churchy friends.
Tonite, I had chapter 3 with the first group - so, let me share what we had.

Chapter 3: the Prophet
as u might have read my excerpt about this man. he is a Visionary.
he loves confrontation, and hates status quo. he is consumed with a need to communicate with words, music, writing, art or actions. (he must be a really romantic guy..hoho~!)
he can love with a passion and be aggressively loyal to his friends and family. he can take the lead in calling the world to repentance and showing them a path of righteousness.

however, if they are not balanced, these Prophet/ Visionary types may get fanatically focused on one or two weird issues and, in the process, upset the entire family.

when i asked - if any of the girls will actually fall into this kind of guy, one of them said yes! haha :D
guess who?

since the question is a big IF -- what IF, all of us are married to the Prophet types!? how we adapt?

every Prophet needs a good, wise, prudent, stable wife who has a positive outlook on life.
remember - this guy is adventurous. he might have an idea of selling the house, quitting his job, then travelling around the world (sounds interesting, huh? REALLY?)
he will be subjective, thinking about feelings, moods and spiritual insights. so we need to be objective and use common sense.
he MIGHT spend money unwisely, leaving his wife feeling insecure. so we need to learn to be content with what we have.

he is a man of ideas, vision. he will talk. some idea might be crazy, some might be not.
so first, we need to listen!
and we are to talk, give opinions and not to "ARE YOU CRAZY?" him.
we need to practice how to speak up our mind - what we think from other point of view (less crazier, perhaps) with WISDOM and LOVE.
be flexible.
be loyal.
as any other men, he needs our supports! - though the whole world thinks he's out of mind, let him know that we are on his side.
without his supporting wife, he feels alone.

Thomas Edison was great after his 999th failure to make a light bulb. the 1st 'til 10th trial might be still exciting - but when it hit hundred-th, people started to think he was crazy! but aren't we thankful for him now?
our husband could be one of these crazy EDISONs.
so, enjoy the ride, girls and be prepared ;)